I am being challenged in a way I have never been challenged before... due to my own INaction and INability to deal with something, I have created quite a mess... I am at the end of me - so different than ever before. Father it is Your strength I seek and need. Your words to flow through me and Your grace that I so desperately appreciate at this very moment.
Help me be still... to trust... prepare...expect to see Your work in all this. I am so crushed by my own disobedience. Lead me in this in a great way. Uphold me as I have no strength left and there is so far. Yet to go.
Oh LORD, I so need your strength to pursue this confrontation that is so overdue. The unraveling of it all is completely in Your hands. As I pray and come to You in whole heart, broken of pride and determined to see Your mercies in this endeavor, I ask for more belief and even more after that to be truthful, tactful and tenacious in speaking what so desperately needs to be spoken. I am Yours LORD and so humbled by my own inabilities; I pray for favor as this is done... as my unraveling becomes Your weaving - help me to be all that You desire me to be, today and through it ALL!
Tonight I give Him thanks that in this moment of preparing, I can see His strength in my steps and words. I give Him thanks because He is my every bit of courage when I am less than courageous... I give Him thanks because through all the challenges, I have seen His mercies and favor. I give Him thanks in spite of the enemy's efforts to thwart all His perfect efforts to show me blessings in trouble and in trials.
AND I TRUST HIM NOW DURING THIS TIME
."The sluggard does not plow after the autumn,
So he begs during the harvest and has nothing.
A plan in the heart of a man is like deep water,
But a man of understanding draws it out.
Many a man proclaims his own loyalty,
But who can find a trustworthy man?
A righteous man who walks in his integrity—
How blessed are his sons after him.
A king who sits on the throne of justice
Disperses all evil with his eyes.
Who can say, “I have cleansed my heart,
I am pure from my sin”?"
~Proverbs 20:4-9 (New American Standard Bible)
Father it is these things that You truly desire for us... integrity, trustworthiness, turning from evil and a true clean heart. For these things the Holy Spirit must be present and working.