When I am hiding from You Lord, whether in sin, out of disbelief or lack of understanding, those are the times when exhaustion takes over, when the thought of moving forward is disabling and the cries of my heart are most needy. And, what I know from my personal experiences is that when we dwell in that place of harboring against God, we reap, that which is not God.
“I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against You. Praise be to you, LORD; teach me your decrees. With my lips I recount all the laws that come from your mouth. I rejoice in following your statutes as one rejoices in great riches. I meditate on your precepts and consider your ways. I delight in your decrees; I will not neglect Your word.” ~Psalm 119:10-20 (New International Version)
It is in the moments that I can be still with You, that I am exhilarated and energized and it is through Your power that I can mobilize all my efforts. It is in those moments that I can see how it is only You and truly You who fulfills all my needs. It is in the power of the Holy Spirit that change will occur, but it is in my own actions that the process will begin, continue and be fulfilled.
“Let Your love, GOD, shape my life with salvation, exactly as You promised; Then I'll be able to stand up to mockery because I trusted Your Word. Don't ever deprive me of truth, not ever—Your commandments are what I depend on. Oh, I'll guard with my life what You've revealed to me, guard it now, guard it ever; And I'll stride freely through wide open spaces as I look for Your truth and Your wisdom; Then I'll tell the world what I find, speak out boldly in public, unembarrassed. I cherish Your commandments—oh, how I love them!—relishing every fragment of Your counsel.” ~Psalm 119:41-48 (The Message)
I never want to “come off” as a “know it all” or even give the impression that “I am wise”. However, I am in a very beneficial position. I am the daughter of the King – highly favored, love unendingly and forgiven once and for all. And, that is something that still blows my mind and is impossible to understand or comprehend, yet it is true. I have an amazing God a Father who never gives up on me; a savior who gave it all for me, how is it even possible for me to repay what has been given? It’s quite simple, I cannot do anything, but I can be grateful and thankful – in more than words, in action – in growth – in sharing.
From the depths of my soul, Lord... let it be from the depths of You that I speak – especially when I run across a difficult person, or a discussion starts to become difficult, I find myself stopping listening to that person (hearing them out), and asking the Holy Spirit to respond, and most of the time, not responding. Just listening.
It is in the power of the Holy Spirit that change will occur, but it is in my own actions that the process will begin, continue and be fulfilled.
I have seen my share of the desert, have you? I have a deep sense of change in my heart about being in the desert, in the valley and even in the middle of a storm – this is not where God wants me, and when I am there, I am there by choice. Let me explain – it is not the challenge I choose, it is how I respond to it, that is my choice. A recent example is living with physical pain. In the past, the more pain I experienced, the more I focused on how “painful” it was. As, God reaches down and wraps His promises around my heart, I began to look at the pain as temporary. Something that went along with my temporary dwelling place called earth. As I started to believe the "temporary” is just that, my thoughts can then dwell and move to the permanency of Him.
“Teach me, O LORD, how to live by Your laws, and I will obey them to the end. Help me understand so that I can follow Your teachings. I will guard them with all my heart. Lead me on the path of Your commandments, because I am happy with them. Direct my heart toward Your written instructions rather than getting rich in underhanded ways. Turn my eyes away from worthless things. Give me a new life in Your ways. Keep Your promise to me so that I can fear You. Take away insults, which I dread, because Your regulations are good. I long for Your guiding principles. Give me a new life in Your righteousness.” ~Psalm 119:33-40 (GOD’S WORD Translation)